Apparent competence — what it means

Marsha Linehan's term for the BPD pattern of looking capable and composed in some settings while being unable to function in others — which leads observers to badly underestimate the genuine distress underneath.

What it looks like

Beloved and high-functioning at work, articulate in public — then home falls apart by dinner. People say "but they seem so fine," which is exactly why no one believes you.

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