Will my partner find out I used this?

Not unless you tell them. Your reflections are private and kept to your account; nothing is sent by email by default; and you can delete your account in one click. We're built on the assumption you value your privacy.

Can I bring this to my therapist?

Yes — the report prints as a PDF, and the Companion lets you save incidents to a private evidence file you can hand a clinician. Many survivors say it's the artifact that finally moved a therapist past circling.

What if I'm wrong about them?

Good question to keep asking — and a sign of empathy, not narcissism. The reflection isn't a verdict on the person. It names patterns in behavior. A clinician makes the diagnosis; we just give you vocabulary.

Will this make things worse?

Naming what's happening tends to clarify rather than escalate. If you're in a high-risk situation (physical violence, threats with weapons, sexual coercion), please call 1-800-799-7233 before you do anything else. Safety plan first; reflection second.

The education library and the survivor community are free, forever. The deeper, personalized tools (your AI reflection, the Companion, the evidence file) are part of a paid plan. Safety planning and crisis resources are always free.

If you're asking the question, you almost certainly aren't. NPD is defined in part by the absence of that question. Asking is empathy in action.

How to heal from narcissistic abuse

Healing from narcissistic abuse means rebuilding the things it eroded — your sense of reality, your self-worth, and your identity — usually in that order. It's not linear, and it's not about “getting over it” quickly; it's about getting yourself back. With distance, support, and self-compassion, recovery is genuinely possible.

First: it was real, and it wasn't your fault

Abuse survivors often spend the early recovery convinced they're overreacting. You're not. Naming what happened — and that it was a pattern of control, not your failure — is the foundation everything else is built on.

What recovery tends to look like

Coming out of the fog — the gaslighting lifts and you start trusting your own memory again.
Grief — mourning the relationship you hoped for, and the time lost.
Anger — often a healthy, energizing stage, not a setback.
Rebuilding — reconnecting with yourself, your people, and your future.

These overlap and repeat. Going “backwards” for a while is normal, not failure.

What helps

No contact (or low contact) — you can't heal in the wound.
A trauma-informed therapist — ideally one who understands narcissistic abuse and complex trauma.
Rebuilding connection — abuse isolates; recovery is relational.
Re-learning your own preferences — small choices (food, music, plans) rebuild a self that was overridden.
Body-based care — sleep, movement, nervous-system regulation; trauma lives in the body.
Patience and self-compassion — talk to yourself like someone you love.

Rebuilding self-trust

The deepest damage of this kind of abuse is to your trust in your own judgment. It comes back the same way it left — slowly, through evidence: keeping small promises to yourself, noticing when your gut was right, and letting safe people reflect reality back to you.

Keep reading

Common questions

How long does it take to heal from narcissistic abuse?

There's no fixed timeline — it depends on the length and severity of the abuse, your support, and whether you're still in contact. Many people feel meaningfully better within months of going no contact and starting support, with deeper healing over a year or more. Non-linear is normal.

Can you fully recover?

Yes. Many survivors not only recover but rebuild a stronger sense of self and healthier relationships. Recovery doesn't mean forgetting; it means it no longer runs your life.

Do I need therapy to heal?

It's not strictly required, but a trauma-informed therapist makes a real difference — especially for the self-trust and complex-trauma pieces. Support groups, trusted people, and self-education help too.

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