Unmasked is a private, trauma-informed space that gives you words for what you have been living through in a narcissistic or borderline relationship, so that a confusing and painful pattern finally has a name you can point to. If you have spent months or years wondering whether you are overreacting, doubting your own memory, or quietly asking yourself "is it me?", this is a place built by survivors to help you understand the relationship clearly and feel genuinely supported rather than judged.
The site walks you through a guided, self-paced reflection about someone you suspect has narcissistic (NPD) or borderline (BPD) patterns, and then explains in plain language what those patterns tend to look like in everyday relationships — the gaslighting, the DARVO, the trauma bonding, and the slow erosion of self-trust that leaves so many people feeling lost. Everything here is educational and evidence-based: Unmasked never diagnoses the other person and never tells you what to do, it simply helps you name your experience and connect with a moderated community of people who have lived through something similar.
Learning is free, your reflection is private, and you can delete your account and all of your data at any time with a single tap. When you are ready to go deeper, optional tools can help you decode a difficult message, keep a private record you can share with a therapist, and build a practical plan to protect your peace and your safety.
Unmasked is built for one situation — yours — when a partner, parent, ex, sibling, in-law, co-parent, or boss shows narcissistic or borderline patterns:
If that's you, you're in the right place — 13 or 93, free or paid.
Understanding narcissistic patterns (NPD) · Understanding borderline patterns (BPD) · How NPD and BPD differ · Glossary of terms · Red-flags checklist · Guides and articles · Types of abusive relationships · Tools and features · Start a free reflection · Survivor community · Find a trauma-informed therapist · Plans & pricing
1. Learn. Put names to what's been happening — gaslighting, DARVO, trauma bonding — in plain language. Free, no account needed.
2. Reflect. Answer guided questions about your relationship and receive a private, written reflection — yours to keep or bring to therapy.
3. Take action. Use the tools — boundaries, evidence file, AI Decoder, community — to protect your peace and take the next step.
Name the pattern. A DSM-5-informed reflection that turns fog into plain language — gaslighting, DARVO, the warm-then-cold cycle.
Draft the reply. Paste what they sent. The AI Decoder hands back something calm and boundaried you can actually send.
Keep the record. Save incidents to a private evidence file — printable for a therapist or a protective order.
Not unless you tell them. Your reflections are private and kept to your account; nothing is sent by email by default; and you can delete your account in one click. We're built on the assumption you value your privacy.
Yes — the report prints as a PDF, and the Companion lets you save incidents to a private evidence file you can hand a clinician. Many survivors say it's the artifact that finally moved a therapist past circling.
Good question to keep asking — and a sign of empathy, not narcissism. The reflection isn't a verdict on the person. It names patterns in behavior. A clinician makes the diagnosis; we just give you vocabulary.
Naming what's happening tends to clarify rather than escalate. If you're in a high-risk situation (physical violence, threats with weapons, sexual coercion), please call 1-800-799-7233 before you do anything else. Safety plan first; reflection second.
The education library and the survivor community are free, forever. The deeper, personalized tools (your AI reflection, the Companion, the evidence file) are part of a paid plan. Safety planning and crisis resources are always free.
If you're asking the question, you almost certainly aren't. NPD is defined in part by the absence of that question. Asking is empathy in action.
Clinically reviewed by the Unmasked care team. This content was written and reviewed by a licensed nurse practitioner and Nicole, a registered nurse, both with direct experience supporting individuals affected by narcissistic and borderline relationship patterns. All content is trauma-informed and evidence-based. It is educational, not a clinical diagnosis.
You are not alone, and help is available any time of day or night. In the United States you can reach trusted, confidential support through the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233, and the National Institute of Mental Health.